THE PET TEACHER
In-YOUR-Home Dog Training
248-232-3655
TWO SIDES TO EVERY BEHAVIOR
Good and bad ... up and down ... step forward, step backward ... wanted and unwanted.  For
every behavior in all species there are two sides - what we like and what we dislike.

As the human species, we tend to warmly accept what we like in a partner without much
fanfare, but we can be quite vocal about what we don’t like.  It is the human basic nature
to notice something only when it’s broken in our eyes.  However, that doesn’t mean that it’
s broken in the eyes of the other person.

We also tend to believe that all relationships have a 50-50 stake in the success of our
interactions.  We give 50% and the other person better give 50% -- or else.  That myth
will generally lead us to failed communications because if you want to achieve success in
your interactions you are responsible for two things: 1) to communicate what you want, and
2) to take 100% responsibility for achieving your happiness.  You must have mutual
agreement that the goal is the same and you both must go 100% of the way to reach that
goal - not just give half of yourself.

This also applies to our relationships with our dogs.  YOU are responsible to communicate
what you want your dog to achieve and YOU must contribute 100% of your ability to
accomplish the goal.  If you only tell your dog what you don’t want, your dog will not
automatically understand what you do want.  Whatever your dog was doing was his natural
response.  It was not a good or bad response; it was what came instinctively to him.

Yelling ‘no’ or spanking the dog does not give the dog achievable information.  It just tells
him that you’ve become upset about something.  It’s entirely possible that the dog has
already changed what he was thinking about by the time you yelled NO.  The dog may have
stopped because your emotional state communicated that you were not happy, but his
stopping doesn’t at all mean that he knows you were upset with him or what specifically you
were upset with.  You MUST teach your dog the behavior you desire if you want to ensure
your dog’s success, and therefore, your happiness with your dog.  In order to move from
unwanted to wanted, YOU must teach the wanted behavior and use your ‘no’ to interrupt
what you don’t want so you can immediately tell him what you DO want and then reward his
success.

Most every behavior that you don’t like or you label as bad is actually your dog’s innate
response; his in-born reactions.  In order for him to learn to change his natural response,
you have to first teach him a new response.

My clients consistently tell me that the thing most difficult for them to grasp is that
their dog is an entirely different species.  An alien species, created for a different
lifestyle than living in our homes, yet incredibly brilliant and willing to change their natural
behaviors in order to fit in with our daily life.  For every behavior you don’t want, there is
a second side that you do want - as long as you teach him how to achieve that second side.

When you use force and/or pain techniques -- you say ‘no’ or you yank a choke chain, poke
him with your fingers, tap him with your foot, push him on his side, hold his mouth closed,
pinch his toes/cheeks/ears, and then you stop there without continuing on to remind him
“stop, don’t do this but DO this” you are merely teaching him that every once in awhile you
become crazy.  But he has no idea what will PREVENT you from becoming crazy and stop
you from using force, fear or intimidation on him.  We know what we want the dog to do
when we say no, but he has absolutely no idea how he needs to consistently behave in order
to keep everyone sane.  That’s where you come in with teaching him what he needs to do,
so that when he performs his natural response that you think is inappropriate, you can then
remind him “stop, don’t do this but DO this.”

There are two sides to every behavior - one is the unwanted side and one is the wanted
side.  If you are not getting the wanted side, then it’s 100% up to you to teach your dog
how to perform the wanted side.  Don’t stop at no, or yank a choke chain, or poke your
fingers into your dog, tap him with your foot, and all the other force, fear or intimidation
moves we think will cause him to do what we want.  Teach him what success looks like, then
practice it using real positive reinforcement methods, and reward the success.  Soon that
will become his new natural response.